Here's the rest of the list of occupational "definitions" (continuing from yesterday) and 3 hopefully provocative questions.
An actuary is someone who brings a bomb on a plane, because that decreases the chances that there will be another bomb on the plane.
An auditor is someone who arrives after the battle and bayonets all the wounded.
A banker is a person who lends you an umbrella when the sun is shining and wants it back the minute it begins to rain.
An economist is an expert who will know tomorrow why the things she predicted yesterday didn't happen today.
A mathematician is a blind person in a dark room looking for a black cat which isn't there.
A modern artist is someone who throws paint on canvas, wipes it off with a cloth, and then sells the cloth as art.
A programmer is someone who solves a problem you didn't know you had in a way you don't understand.
A topologist is a person who doesn't know the difference between a coffee cup and a donut.
1. Have you ever heard any other jokes about topologists?
2. Of all the jobs on this list (from yesterday and today) which one (that you don't already have) would you like to have for one day, just to see what it was like?
3. Want to be a comedian? Take your best shot at writing one of these definitions. I'll get it started: "An internet blogger is someone who..."